This was a letter written to appeal for a proper placement for our son as he was to move out of a psychiatric hospitalization placement to a residential treatment facility. Our son was in high school at the time. The verbiage is exact except for individual names that have been changed.
“My son has been in Elmcrest Hospital for over 5 months with a diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder. This has been the first correct diagnosis of his life, after many years of repeated mis-diagnosis.
Our son is in the Voluntary Services Program through DCF. Now, although he has been ready to move on to a residential facility, DCF wants to have him re-evaluated at High Meadows, which is state-run, and twice as expensive as the facility we want him to attend — Devereux-Glenholme. DCF’s rationale is that they feel that Elmcrest is not 100% sure whether James should go to a residential or group home, although they have all signed a letter stating that he needs to be in a “therapeutic residential treament facility.”
Our family went to DCF for help for our son, who we love very deeply. We went to DCF, because neither PHS nor Connecticare would pay for treatment beyond a few days. Even though the DCF mission statement says that parents should be actively involved in the treatment and placement process of their child, when when we did advocate for our child, I was told I had to leave my husband in order to get my son back. We were also rebuffed and treated as incompetent and neglectful.
All we wanted for our son was help in the most appropriate facility within the DCF system. What we all received is platitudes, miscommunication, damage to our son’s mental health and treatment progress, denial of services for saying “NO,” and now hearings and lawyers.
I have yet to see anyone other than myself, my husband, and now our attorney, really advocating for the needs of our son, who is at the mercy of everyone around him. We love our child, and we will not give up advocating for his needs until he receives the most appropriate services that exist in the DCF system.
I cannot describe to you of the deep level of suffering induced upon our marriage, our family, and our son. Long ago my husband and I gave up time with each other. Long ago we had to stop nurturing our marriage and familial ties due to the constant and insistent stresses and pressures applied to us by DCF. Long ago all faith I had in my government was covered up and destroyed by intolerance, insensitivity, and the worst offender of all– ignorance.
Long ago we lost our child to a debilitating, life-threatening, family altering biological disease called Bipolar Disorder. Long ago we realized that we will never be able to have that sweet, bubbly, loving, warm, engaging, bright child by in our lives, so that we could watch him reach his fullest potential as a human being. Long ago we lost a child……….
We only want the proper treatment so we can get some of him back in our lives to love, support, and nurture.
Thank You,”
We never received a response to this letter from anyone.
Comments, as always, are welcome.
